Dave’s Wagon

I must admit, I have something of a minor fascination with Communist propaganda.

One such example I find interesting is the flowery language and unnecessary qualifiers the USSR and China have used to name their wars. Examples include the Soviet “Great Patriot War” (WWII) as well as China’s “War to Resist America and Aid Korea” (Korean War) and the “War to Resist Japanese Aggression” (Second Sino-Japanese War).

Obviously, in the U.S., we tend to take a more neutral, truncated approach to naming our conflicts, but what if we didn’t? I believe it might look like this:

Revolutionary War = Great Patriot Revolution Against Minor Tax Levies

Civil War = Glorious Reunification War Against Typhoid Fever, Dysentery, Measles, Mumps, Whooping Cough, Malaria, and, Occasionally, Confederate Troops

World War II = War of Ignoring German Aggression, Ignoring German Aggression, Lend-Lease Act Enacting against German Aggression, Resisting German Aggression, and, ultimately, TiVoing Band of Brothers off of HBO

Korean War = War to Repel Communist Forces to the 38th Parallel, No, Make that the Yalu River, Fuck! Never mind, the 38th is Fine!

Vietnam War = Glorious War to Oppose Monolithic Global Threat which Becomes Increasingly Less Glorious with each Passing Year

Iraq War = See Above

Any suggestions for the ones I missed?

A hat tip to Weird Asian News via OneManBandwidth on this find.

It’s apparently a children’s coloring book published in China called “Military Weaponry for Kids”. Above is what must be the cover, complete with two very happy children piloting a battle tank along with their sunglass-wearing, Kalashnikov-toting dog.

Now, I grew up playing with green plastic army men, Command & Conquer video games, and Airsoft guns, and despite the way I turned out, I still believe a little playful military influence on one’s upbringing can do no harm. Then again, while if I had had kids, I’d have no problem with them drawing and coloring the cutesy little army tank from the book…

I think I’d find the “silenced pistol” page a little too sinister for preschool-aged tots.

And come to think of it, I’m not sure I care for the possible interpretations of the tank drawing either…

Question: are there any good websites where one (i.e. me) would be able to purchase books in Chinese? This would include non-kosher titles like Orwell’s 1984 (一九八四？）.

Please speak up if you’re the wiser.

Thanks.

Cens0rship is bad, but next in line is certainly collective apathy.

Networks Criticized for Lack of Anna Nicole Smith Coverage

That piece is satire, but it nonetheless hits the nail on the head.

At least these poll results imply that it might be the news networks and not the majority of Americans that need to seriously reorganize their priorities.

If you haven’t already, here are two China documentaries I feel are worth seeing:

China from the Inside (official site, torrents)

A four part PBS documentary on government, women, the environment, and freedom in China. A bit on the dry side (hey, it is PBS), but interesting and informative nonetheless.

Seoul Train (official site, torrent)

A documentary about China’s policy of forced repatriation for North Korean refugees/immigrants who flee into China. Details the efforts of underground activists who attempt to smuggle North Koreans to safety.