Dave’s Wagon

I must admit, I have something of a minor fascination with Communist propaganda.

One such example I find interesting is the flowery language and unnecessary qualifiers the USSR and China have used to name their wars. Examples include the Soviet “Great Patriot War” (WWII) as well as China’s “War to Resist America and Aid Korea” (Korean War) and the “War to Resist Japanese Aggression” (Second Sino-Japanese War).

Obviously, in the U.S., we tend to take a more neutral, truncated approach to naming our conflicts, but what if we didn’t? I believe it might look like this:

Revolutionary War = Great Patriot Revolution Against Minor Tax Levies

Civil War = Glorious Reunification War Against Typhoid Fever, Dysentery, Measles, Mumps, Whooping Cough, Malaria, and, Occasionally, Confederate Troops

World War II = War of Ignoring German Aggression, Ignoring German Aggression, Lend-Lease Act Enacting against German Aggression, Resisting German Aggression, and, ultimately, TiVoing Band of Brothers off of HBO

Korean War = War to Repel Communist Forces to the 38th Parallel, No, Make that the Yalu River, Fuck! Never mind, the 38th is Fine!

Vietnam War = Glorious War to Oppose Monolithic Global Threat which Becomes Increasingly Less Glorious with each Passing Year

Iraq War = See Above

Any suggestions for the ones I missed?

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 10th, 2007 @ 5:59 am on the category China, USA, Politics. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

I must admit, I have something of a minor fascination with Communist propaganda.

One such example I find interesting is the flowery language and unnecessary qualifiers the USSR and China have used to name their wars. Examples include the Soviet “Great Patriot War” (WWII) as well as China’s “War to Resist America and Aid Korea” (Korean War) and the “War to Resist Japanese Aggression” (Second Sino-Japanese War).

Obviously, in the U.S., we tend to take a more neutral, truncated approach to naming our conflicts, but what if we didn’t? I believe it might look like this:

Revolutionary War = Great Patriot Revolution Against Minor Tax Levies

Civil War = Glorious Reunification War Against Typhoid Fever, Dysentery, Measles, Mumps, Whooping Cough, Malaria, and, Occasionally, Confederate Troops

World War II = War of Ignoring German Aggression, Ignoring German Aggression, Lend-Lease Act Enacting against German Aggression, Resisting German Aggression, and, ultimately, TiVoing Band of Brothers off of HBO

Korean War = War to Repel Communist Forces to the 38th Parallel, No, Make that the Yalu River, Fuck! Never mind, the 38th is Fine!

Vietnam War = Glorious War to Oppose Monolithic Global Threat which Becomes Increasingly Less Glorious with each Passing Year

Iraq War = See Above

Any suggestions for the ones I missed?

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 10th, 2007 @ 5:59 am on the category China, USA, Politics. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.